Chapter 8 - Worlds Apart

I am truly sorry! Kept you waiting far too long for the next chapter

Chapter Eight

31.12.
“Baby, wake up, we are about to land.” Elena felt lips on her cheek and flinched.
Landing? What? Where? Why?
She sat up and almost fell down from her seat.
What in the world...? Dozily she stared at Samu that was sitting next to her, grabbing her astound.
“You alright love?” he asked concerned and tried to pull her up and make her sit upright. “Wanna have a drink or something?”
She closed her eyes, carefully shaking her head. “No... no, I’m... I’m fine. I’m fine.” Quickly she threw a gaze around. There was Sami with a blond girl by his side, Osmo was sitting right behind her, talking to someone. Raul. She recognized his voice and his laughter. Riku sat on the other side of the small plane with a blond girl, sleeping with her head rested to his shoulder.
She was back.
Why was she back?
How could she be dreaming again?
She shut her eyes firmly. The pills! She had taken one right before going to sleep... How in the freaking world was it possible that she was back in her dreams now?
Completely baffled she leaned over, resting her temple to Samu’s arm.
He was here, they all were. He was real, she could smell the familiar scent of his cologne.
How could this be?
She was out of words, not even realizing that the plane actually landed and they were all picked up by two cars. Driving along the dark streets, bordered with rocks, palm trees and oleander plants, she pretended to be asleep again.
Not wanting to wake her up, Samu took her in his arms as soon as the cars stopped.
Her eyes remained closed. It was impossible for her to even think about doing conversation with all of them now. She felt sick, scared and somehow she had the weird feeling of being home and safe with Samu. It was all too weird. Pretending to sleep was the best idea for now. Breathing in and out as steady and calm as possible, she listened to all the noises surrounding her. There was soft and warm wind, whispering in the bushes when Samu started carrying her along. The silent rolling of an ocean nearby.
“It’s beautiful!” the high-pitched sound of a female voice resounded from behind. “Look at the beach! Gosh, it’s awesome!”
“Up for a swim?” she suddenly heard Riku’s voice and the girl giggled.
“Well, as long as you join me and you are naked, I’m in!”
She sounded flirty and Elena felt a little itch of jealousy. Stupid feeling! He wasn’t hers, what the hell was wrong with her?
A door was opened and the sounds from the outside faded away. Samu carried her up the stairs and entered a room where he put her down on a soft bed. “Sleep well, love.” He whispered, resting his lips on her forehead. “I’ll be back in a minute.” His steps on the carpet faded and the door was closed.
Carefully she opened her eyes, gazing around the room. It was quite small, not bigger than her bedroom at home in Helsinki. She swallowed hard. Home.
Taking a deep breath she stared at the wooden panelling at the ceiling and the white and light blue walls of the room. There were two open windows and a balcony door to her right, a small commode at the wall in front of the bed. A real summer house. Warm wind blew inside through the thin white curtains, blowing them up a little. Ocean sounds. Salty smell. She sat up completely, walking over to the balcony door. The view was breath-taking. A long, white shore, some palm trees swaying in the wind. Soft waves crashing in, encountering the shore. The moon was almost full and enlightened the whole scenery with its brilliant silver shine.
She wrapped her arms around herself, realising in surprise that she wore a thin, white summer dress. She had to go back to sleep. Slowly she turned over to the huge bed made of dark wood. Everything would be in order again as soon as she closed her eyes. It would be winter again. She would be home in Finland, having breakfast with her family. Everything would be alright.
Shivering she lay down and took off her shoes, wrapping herself into one of the blankets. Everything would be fine again.
 
She awoke in the morning when somebody knocked at her door. “Cumin’, Lilly!” she mumbled, trying to sit up, but an arm was wrapped around her from behind and she felt a warm body moving closer.
“Let ‘em knock as much as they want!” a deep voice mumbled and Elena grew stiff in his arms.
A new morning, but still she was here! It had never been two mornings in a row at one place since the dreams had started.
Elena took a deep breath.
Trying to find any kind of algorithm in her dreams she closed her eyes. There was no point in trying to make sense of it but at least there should be some... scheme? Some calculating rule? Only something? First it had been a night/day-thing. Even if she had fallen asleep during the day at the beginning she returned home. But... It had changed. The afternoon-nap on the couch. She had still been in Samu’s arms even after sleeping there for a few hours. The pills had given her a little break but now everything seemed to start over again and was even stronger than before.
She buried her face in the pillow, feeling Samu’s body moving closer again, his hand slipping into the neckline of her dress, cupping her breast. He sighed, softly kissing his way over her shoulder and her neck.
Another knock at the door was heard. “Ou cum ooooooooon, you two!” Raul sounded annoyed. “Everybody’s having breakfast, we’re heading off for the beach soon! Cum on, join us! Last day of the year and it’s eleven already!!”
The hand was removed and Samu sighed again. Yawning he turned around to lie on his back. “Christ, have mercy! We’re coming! Jeez, mate! Chill!” he ran his hands through his hair and got up, stretching his back. Quickly he bent down again, kissing Elena’s lips.
“You can go without me, luv.” Again he kissed her, grabbing a packet of cigarettes from the bedside table. “I’ll be right with you.” Grinning he stepped outside onto the balcony. Only a split second later a yelp was heard and Samu broke into laughter, leaning over the balustrade. “Come on! It’s not like I’m having a boner or something! If you can’t handle it, Juliane, just don’t look!”
“Well, so you tell me: how am I supposed to have my sausage for breakfast when you put yours right into my face?” she yelled back up at him and laughed. “Anyway, what’s the story, morning glory?”
Slowly Elena dragged herself up on her feet and went outside. She placed herself right in front of her naked husband, making a blond woman on the terrace of the ground floor giggle and wave. “At least you are dressed, babes!”
A little unassertive Elena laughed along with her. Babes? She had never talked to this woman in her entire life. Very well then. Most probably she was her friend. Looking around the table her gaze found another woman. She was tiny, maybe even smaller than herself, sitting next to Riku with her thin white legs on his lap. Elena felt this strange little itch from last night again, quickly trying to shake it off. She wasn’t jealous! Not because of this little blond doll, eating a grapefruit for breakfast while everyone around was having sausages, bacon and eggs. Tiny doll looked up, her alabaster cheeks blushing when she saw Samu naked. Quickly she lowered her eyes but only seconds later she flashed another gaze at him and blushed even deeper.
“It’s like an accident.” Elena raised her eyebrow at the doll. “You can’t take yer eyes off it, right?”
The whole table broke into laughter when Dolly choked on her grapefruit.
Riku patted her back, trying hard to suppress his giggles. “You haven’t been introduced properly, hun! I think you were asleep when we arrived at the airport yesterday.” He smiled at Elena and squinted when the sun hit his eyes. “Elena, this is Jewell. Jewell, my dear friend Elena.”
You’ve got to be kidding me! Little precious’ name was JEWELL? Elena threw a gaze at her grinning and smoking husband. “Are you fucking kidding me?” she whispered, trying to hold back a few giggles. His grin widened and he shrugged. “Love is blind!” he whispered back, wrapping his arm around her from behind. “And certainly deaf as well!” he added, making her chuckle. Carefully he kissed the back of her neck, his fingers playing around the outlines of her tattoo. “Just imagine him on top of her, how come she’s still in one piece?”
Elena burst into laughter. “Wonder how.” Her eyes were locked with little precious that had just recovered from her coughing spell. Still her pale face was red but her gaze was curious. She looked Elena up and down, moving a little closer to Riku to wrap her arms around his neck. “Come on, the beach is waiting!” she purred and kissed him, still watching Elena from the corner of her eye.
Grinning inwardly, Elena rested her head against Samu’s chest. ‘Try not to drown with your lack of body fat!’ She thought, before heading inside to find something else to wear.
 
The guys were playing fussball when Elena returned from swimming up and down the beach on her own for a while. The water was cold but still the sun was shining brightly. Savouring the feeling of the warm sunlight on her wet skin, Elena sat down in the sand, closing her eyes and ignoring the stickiness of the salty water. Suddenly she heard somebody clearing her throat and opened her eyes a little irritated. It was Sami’s girlfriend. Juliane, Elena remembered quickly. “Hey there, everything alright?”
“Sure.” Juliane placed her towel next to Elena in the sand. “Just needed to get away from the little diamond over there. Do you get it? I mean, helllloooouuu! What the freaking hell is wrong with Riku? Has she fucked his brains back into stone age or what?”
“Most probably.” Elena muttered, throwing a little flat stone into the water. “I assume, I must be bisased, but for all I care my new name’s prejudice and that one,” secretly she pointed at Jewell. “That one’s skinny, stupid, annoying and shallow.”
Juliane giggled. “I agree, prejudice.” She dug her toes into the sand. “So what are we going to do about it? I mean, she’s really stupid! No, no! I mean it! I think she’s from the US, somewhere southwest, I don’t know, but she actually asked me about Lapland these days, where I was born raised, telling me that she liked the Stockholm area best because it was the sunniest part of Finland…”
“No way!” Elena looked up, finding the blond woman nodding. “We tried to talk about the war in Afghanistan this morning and all she could add was that all those Iraqi-Muslims scared her a lot with all their bombs and stuff.”
Elena chuckled, putting her face on her knees. “Oh my.” She sighed. “So what are we supposed to do now? Cut her out? Ignore her? I could easily do that, she’s not too fond of me anyway.”
“We should try our best. You think we might manage to pretend she’s not there?”
Elena nodded, patting the other woman’s leg. “Yes we can! Maybe we can just put her in the trunk of a car and drive for a bit, she won’t find her way home, don’t you think? Most probably she has no idea where we are. Bahamas sounds like a faraway fairy-land!”
Giggling Juliane sat up. Throwing a quick gaze around, she rolled her eyes. “Here we go again!” she mumbled, moving a little closer to Elena, when Jewell approached. She had been sitting close to the ball-playing men for half an hour, watching Riku, cheering and applauding for him. Well, he wasn’t a bad player but today it was impossible to watch him and his two left feet.
Little precious seemed a little more loyal.
Watching her putting down her towel right in front of the two others, Elena narrowed her eyes, realising that she was now blocking the view over the ocean completely. Obviously she needed to have an eye on Riku and the rest of the lads.
Her blond hair was annoyingly beautiful, fluttering in the soft wind and Elena ran her sandy hands through her own wet and salty hair. What the fuck? There was no need to feel intimidated by this little toy Riku had most probably brought in his hand luggage! Sitting up Elena straightened her back. ‘My brain’s a lot bigger than yours.’ She thought. ‘And so are my tits!’
“Hey!” Jewell smiled endearing. “Isn’t this beach just awe-some?”
“Try the water, it’s fantastic!” Elena nodded at the soft waves, hoping that little princess could take a hint.
Unfortunately the tiny blonde shook her head, her eyes widened in shock. “No way! It’s cold! And all the salt, I’d need my coiffeur right away! God, you are so lucky with this strong hair of yours!” her lips were still smiling, but there was something else in her blue eyes. Rivalry? Competition?
Surprised Elena cocked her head. Animosity? Because of what? Being Riku’s ex-girlfriend? She fought back a grin. ‘Wake up darling!’ she thought. ‘You were in primary school when I dated him!’
“Well,” she crossed her ankles and faced the afternoon sun. “I’m damn lucky, I know!”
“My saying.” Jewell moved a little closer, her voice becoming a bit more mellifluous. “You’re quite happy with Samu, aren’t you?”
A little surprised Elena looked at her. “We wouldn’t share our lives if we weren’t, don’t ye think?”
“Ou, you can do those accents too!” clapping Jewell giggled. “You almost sound like them! I’ve tried sooo hard but I never manage!”
“I’m not just doing it, that’s my actual dialect!”
“Oh so you are Scandinavianish as well? You lived there too?”
“Live, present tense. And I’m not Scandinavianish, I’m FINNISH! We all are. I went to the same school as Sami, Riku and Osmo. Same town, you know?”
“Ah!” she was about to say something but her head spun around when Riku called her name. At an instant she was on her feet again, running over the sand.
Juliane looked after her. “You think she memorized the Scandinavianish-Finnish-thing? Or anything else you just told her?”
“Nope.” Slowly Elena shook her head. “I think there’s a sieve below the blond hair. She knows Riku’s name, that’s all that counts.”
“Did you realise, she tried to be mean to you!” chuckling Julian waved at her boyfriend that was completely covered in sweat, emptying a bottle of water.
“Yeah I know!” Elena grinned. “That one hit me hard, trust me! Jokes about my hair! Those are taken quite serious! Most probably I’ll cry myself to sleep tonight with this whole mess on my head!”
Juliane burst into laughter. “Come on, let’s go for a little swim!” she jumped up, signalising at Sami that she was heading for the water.
 
Sitting in the shallow waters of the shore after a while, Elena watched Samu with Osmo up on his shoulders fighting Raul and Sami. It was hilarious and she giggled, completely relaxed. Suddenly her vision was darkened and Riku sat down next to her.
“Hej.” He smiled, wrapping his arms around his knees.
“Hej.” She returned his smile, softly nudging him with her elbow. “Why are you not fighting?”
“Count to five, I need someone to sit on for this game!” he leaned back a little, resting his weight on his hands. “But I wanted to talk to you in private for a second anyway.”
Elena raised her eyebrows. “’bout what? Everything alright with ye?”
“Sure.” He grinned. “It’s just that... well, I... I saw you talking to Jewell before.”
“Please don’t say her name, Riku!” Elena burst into laughter. “Her parents are mean, mean people!”
Riku blushed and chuckled. “Well,” he drawled, making Elena nudge him again.
“Spill it, mate!”
“Well, she... she’s a little scared you know? She... she’s a lot younger than we are and... yeah, well, I think she might be a bit intimidated by you. Ex-girlfriend, still friends... you know?”
“Sure.” Elena sighed. “You want me to be nice, right?”
“I’d really appreciate it.” He ran his fingers over her arm, causing goosebumps on her skin. “I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable.” Smirking he stroked her arm with his fingertips. “Nice to see that I still have some effect on you!”
She slapped his knee. “You’d better stop this right now and take care of little precious! You two have everything ahead of you, I’m married and found my first grey pubic hair this morning!”
Riku broke into laughter, wrapping his arms around his knees again. “I have a few by now.” He admitted. “She found some. Told her they were blond.” Sheepishly he grinned. “We could go waxing.”
Snorting with laughter Elena leaned back. “Because of a FEW? I don’t wanna imagine you, sitting on a chair, getting your balls waxed!”
“You could hold my hand.”
“Come back when you are half grey, maybe we can dye them together.”
“Sounds like a plan.” He winked at her. “Thanks for being NICE!”
“Hey!” Elena raised her hands defensively. “I am actually capable of taking hints!”
His gaze ran over Jewell that stood about 30 meters away with her hands on her hips, staring at the two of them. Grinning he winked again. “Thanks anyway, luv!” he waved at the blonde. “I think I should go.”
“You should, my dear grey friend.” Waving at Jewell, Elena bit back a grin.

 

Chapter 7 - Worlds Apart

Chapter Seven

25.12.
 
Elena helped her mother to prepare a late lunch the next afternoon. Working up all her courage, she looked up from the vegetables she had been chopping after a while. “Mom, I... can I talk to you about something?”
Her mother stopped stirring the sauce and dried her hands. “Sure love. What’s wrong?” she stepped closer, caressing her daughter’s cheek. “You look exhausted, are you alright? I’ve been worried about you today.”
Elena sighed and put the carrot and the knife down in the sink. “I’m not feeling well, Mom.” She admitted and turned around, resting her back against a cupboard. “I told you about those dreams I’ve had for a few nights now.” She started, kneading her fingers nervously. “It’s weird, I seem to fall asleep but I wake up in this dream only minutes after and... whenever I wake up it is the day before or even earlier and I... I seem to live every day twice. One time with you and one time with... with this man! And now... everything has become so complicated, I... I used to date one of his friends years ago and... I don’t know, everything seems so real and messed up, I... I don’t get enough sleep because I seem to be awake constantly and... I was wondering if you could maybe tell me what to do or prescribe me something for better sleeping.” She shook her head and stared at the floor. “I feel exhausted, Mom. I wanna sleep again and I don’t wanna dream for a few nights!”
Caitlyn hesitated but the pleading look in her daughter’s eyes made her nod. “I will figure something out for you, ok? I don’t wanna prescribe any anti-psychotics, but there are a few things to help you sleep.” She nodded encouraging. “I will get you something for tonight, ok?”
Elena breathed a sigh of relief. “Thanks, Mom. I... I only want this to be over. I really need some rest!”
 
For a few nights her sleep was deep and dreamless and Elena started to feel a lot better. New year’s eve was coming up and she decided to go out with Lilly and Kilian. Even Cedric and Lea joined them in a local pub after all of them had enjoyed a long dinner with their parents.
The party was great and the five of them kept drinking and dancing with some of their old friends from school that had returned home for the holidays as well. It was after two and still the whole pub was full of singing and dancing people, making Elena smile. The Finnish definitely knew how to party even in the smallest places. Fighting her way over to the loo after a while she felt her head spinning. She loved beer, maybe she had loved it a bit too much tonight. Grinning to herself she grabbed the next person in reach, trying to stabilize herself. The young man reacted quickly, laughing along with her. “Ye alright, sweetheart?” he held her by her shoulders for a few seconds until she nodded with a grin.
“Guinness’s gonna be my death one day!”
Laughing he raised his pint. “As well as mine.” Carefully he released her. “Come back before, will ye?”
Elena couldn’t help giggling. “I surely will!” she promised before slowly continuing her way over to the restrooms. There was the typically long queue of girls in front of the lady’s room and Elena sighed in annoyance. Nobody was entering or exiting the men’s, so she decided to get inside after a while because she couldn’t wait any longer. Freshing up her make-up, she remained standing in front of the mirror for a few minutes, arranging her hair and her white and blue dress. Even though it was cold outside Lilly and she had decided to wear dresses over pullovers and thick woollen tights. It was a Finnish night out in Helsinki, so it had to be the flag! Quickly she checked her eye make-up one last time, cursing lowly because she had forgotten her bag with her eye shadow somewhere with her siblings. To hell with it. She looked nice enough for a drunken crowd! Nodding at her reflection she pushed herself away from the sink, reaching out her hand to grab the door handle. To her surprise the door suddenly opened and she was faced with a staggering man.
He stared at her in confusion, quickly checking the sign at the door. “Lady’s is over there!” he pointed right.
“I know, I...” Elena fell silent, gazing at him with disbelieve. “Riku?” she whispered after a few seconds of shock, still staring at the man that was holding on to the door handle for balance.
He exhaled in annoyance. “Not tonight, sweetheart! Not tonight!”
Elena felt the entire colour draining from her face. There he was. Riku Rajamaa. Her last dream came to her mind. His words, the hurt in his eyes and the kisses they had shared, innocent and soft but yet so intimate because of their long history together. Feeling her legs giving in, she stepped back, grabbing the sink in her back for support. She was completely out of words. Little stars were dancing in front of her face and she felt her vision darkening. He grabbed her when her legs gave in eventually, trying to prevent her from falling down onto the dirty floor.
Drawing a few deep breaths, Elena rested her forehead to his shoulder. It was Riku. Her friend Riku. Quickly she tried to make her own feet support the weight of her body again and stepped back. “I... I’m sorry.” She mumbled, realising in surprise that he even smelled the way he had in her dreams. Completely confused she stepped back. “I’m sorry. I might have had a few beers more than it is good for me! I gotta go back to my siblings now.” When she tried to rush over to the door he suddenly stopped her.
“Do I know you from somewhere?” he asked, resting his back at the wall to watch her with narrowed eyes.
He had obviously been drinking as well and Elena wasn’t sure what to answer. ‘Sure, we’ve been in a relationship eight years ago before you broke up with me and I married Samu. Wait, sorry, just my imagination!’ seemed a bit weird, so she only tried to smile. “We... we went to the same school. You finished high school the year before I earned my degree. One of my brothers was in Sami’s year or above, I think.”
“Oh!” suddenly a small smile crept over his face. “So you still live around here?”
“My parents. I moved to London a few years ago for my studies. But now it’s family gathering for the holidays and we all decided to stay over new year’s as well.” Elena returned his smile, feeling her heartbeat slowing down when his smile grew wider.
“You never leave Finland completely, right?”
“Never!” she even managed to wink at him before she turned over to the door again. “So have fun tonight, alright? Happy new year!”
“You too. See you around!”
She left the men’s before he entered one of the toilet cubicles, heading for the bar. She definitely needed another beer now.
“So you came back!” smiling the dark haired man from before stepped aside to give her some space at the crowded counter.
She returned his smile. “Tank is empty, space for more!” leaning over the bar she ordered another beer, chatting along with the man that introduced himself as Mike, a sales manager from Dublin on Holiday. Suddenly someone tapped her back and she turned around, astound to find Riku, smiling broadly.
“Forgot to ask your name.” He shouted at her over the loud music.
“It’s Elena. Elena Heikkinen.” She took his outreached hand.
“Alright then!” he smiled at her, throwing a quick gaze at Mike. “I’ll see you around!”
“See you!” smiling she waved at him. When she turned back at Mike he grinned.
“Friends with the celebrities, hum?” grinning he nodded in the direction Riku had disappeared into.
Elena laughed. “Not exactly, we went to the same school about a hundred years ago, so...” she shrugged. “I just bumped into him in the men’s room. What?” chuckling she shrugged again. “There was a line of 10 girls waiting in front of the lady’s and I needed to pee!”
He threw his head back and laughed. “You’re definitely special, girl! But listen, I gotta go soon, my friends want to go to a club now, d’you wanna join by any chance?”
“Actually I’m here with my siblings and we... well, I could ask, but I assume that they want to stay, it was our pub long ago, our local, you know? But go ahead, have fun! Happy new year, ok?”
“You too! Happy new year!” he gave her a hug before she waved him goodbye to find the rest of her group in the crowd.
They stayed until the pub closed down at about five. Ced collected their coats, handing them over to his siblings and his wife. “Are we complete?” smiling he hugged Lea, obviously proud that she was still standing and even though her belly was huge she hadn’t been complaining all night long. “Come on you guys, let’s get home!”
On their way outside Elena saw Riku in a group of men. She raised her hand, waving at him. He returned her gesture, walking over to her with his jacket in his hands.
“Are you going home now?” he asked, grabbing a chair to regain his balance. Elena chuckled. “We are actually. But we don’t live far, so... What are you up to?”
“Not much.” He grinned. “Going home, getting some sleep.” His gaze ran over the group in front of him. “So these are your siblings, hum?”
Elena nodded. “My brothers Kilian and Cedric with his wife Lea and my sister Lilly.”
Riku took a little bow that almost made him loose his balance again. “Nice to meet you, people!” he slurred, tapping Elena’s back. “See you around, Elena Raikkönen.”
She laughed, quickly grabbing his arms when he was about to stumble across his own feet. “It’s Elena HEIKKINEN, mate! Nevermind, you’ll have forgotten my name anyway as soon as you wake up!”
“No!” he held on to her arm firmly. “I won’t! Promise! You’re nice! You even let me pee without watching or wanting to gimme a hand! Wait!” from the pocket of his jeans he took his mobile. “Elena HEIKKINEN. Alright. Phone number.”
“What?”
“Gimme your phone number!” he looked at her, dangerously swaying from side to side. “We could meet up when I get back to Helsinki, or in London if you want to. Just a chat, a few beers, what d’you say?” grinning he winked at her. “See, I remember you told me about London.”
Completely astounded Elena looked at him. “Alright, so it’s...” she gave him her mobile number, repeating it four times because he hit the wrong buttons, cursing himself under his breath.
“Here we go!” breathing a sigh of relief he let go of her arm, stumbling back a few steps. “So have a good night then! See you around!” waving happily at her siblings, he tried to get into his jacket, failing miserably. Quickly Elena stepped closer, pulling up the zipper. She couldn’t help giggling. He was just like the man she had been dreaming about. Utterly pissed and annoyed, but totally lovable. “Goodnight, Riku!” she waved at him. “Get home safely, will you?”
“Promise!” grinning he grabbed one of his drunken friends. “As long as someone tells me where I live I’m gonna be fine!”
As soon as her group had exited the pub, Lilly grabbed her sister’s hand. “Am I blind or what???” she squealed and started jumping up and down. “That was Riku Rajamaa for fuck’s sake!”
“I know!” Elena laughed. “I bumped into him by accident and we started chatting for a bit.”
“And now he has your phone number! Fuck! D’you think that he will call?” Lilly was still jumping.
“I don’t know! Most probably he will stare at his mobile tomorrow, wondering who the hell Elena Heikkinen is!”
“Good lord, sis! At least you ARE in Riku Rajamaa’s phone book!”
“Excuse me,” Kilian pulled up the zipper of his jacket. “Who was this guy? D’you know him or are you just flirting around, Leni?”
“She’s NOT!” Lilly clapped her hands. “That was Riku Rajamaa!”
“You certainly said that, Lil, I was asking whom he was!”
“He’s the lead guitarist in a band! Remember the tickets Ced got me for Christmas? It’s for his band! Sunrise Avenue!”
“Oh. So this drunken fry was a celebrity then? Let’s get back inside and take some humiliating pictures, come on!” Kilian was about to turn around, but Cedric held him back.
“Come on, Kili! That’s not funny! I went to school with him, one of his friends was in my soccer team and actually quite nice, let him party, most probably he never gets a break!”
“God, you are such a boring lot!” frustrated Kilian kicked a pile of snow. “We could have earned a fortune! He was as pissed as a newt!”
“Boring, hum?” grinning Ced grabbed his younger brother, effortlessly throwing him over a small fence and into a big pile of snow. “Are you bored, little one?” he yelled after him, breaking into laughter when Kilian started throwing snowballs from behind the fence. Soon they were all jumping around in the deserted streets, throwing snow at each other.
It had been a perfect night and Elena realised that she was actually a little absent minded because of Riku. Her dreams were still so close and she could hardly believe that she had just met him. Savouring the smell of his cologne she smiled to herself. He was definitely a nice guy. In her dreams and also in real life. But she knew for sure that he would never call her. This was real life, they didn’t have a history together, hadn’t been dating. He was Riku Rajamaa, the rockstar. She was Elena Heikkinen, medical researcher. That was it. No history, no future. But meeting him, talking and laughing with him had been fun and she returned her sister’s grin when they were hiding behind a parked car together. “Riku Rajamaa, hum?” Lilly smirked. “So what happens to Samu now?”
“Well,” Elena tried to catch her breath. “It’s just like my dream: I was dating Riku but we broke up because of Samu.”
“Well, actually, you are still dating Doc Terrence. But I would break up with him in a split second if Riku Rajamaa wanted my phone number!”
“Don’t you be mean!” Elena nudged her sister with her elbow. “Breaking up with Rob because of Riku’s not an option, you hear me? My relationship with Rob is real, Riku Rajamaa is... well he... he’s not real!” she finished her sentence eventually, not finding the right words.
“Your name’s saved in his phone register!”
“It’s still not real! Lilly! You know what I mean, right?”
Before Lilly could answer the two girls were hit by three snowballs, jumping up squealing.
“Gotcha!” Kilian jumped up and down, dancing madly. “Hiding doesn’t help! I’m the snowball-Master! I...” he was cut off by a snowball from Lilly that hit his face.
Elena cheered. “Go Lilly!”
 
It took the five of them about half an hour of snowball-fighting to reach their parents’ house. Completely out of breath and wet they entered, trying to keep the noises of their steps and giggling as low as possible.
Still thinking about Riku, Elena lay down on her bed after dressing in her warm pj’s. Sweet and handsome, of course. But even after meeting him in real life she realised that he was actually as much part of a fantasy as he was during her long nights of dreaming about the Sunrise Avenue-lads. Quickly she took one of the pills her mother had given her and lay back again. Life was definitely strange sometimes.
She was about to drift away on the waves of sleep, when she heard her mobile beeping. Sleepily and surprised she sat up. Her first impulse was to ignore the textmessage her phone had just received. But maybe it was Rob. He never had the time to text and she didn’t want to ignore him, now that he actually texted her for once.
Feeling around her clothes in the floor she finally found her mobile. It was an unknown number and she narrowed her eyes, not willing to get up completely and find her glasses.
The message was short: “N8, Helsinki-girl.”, and she couldn’t help giggling. Quickly she answered: “N8, Helsinki-boy.”, before she put her mobile aside. Pensively she stared at it again, picking it up to save Riku’s number. Smiling she typed “Helsinki-boy” and arranged her pillow. She had already closed her eyes, when it beeped again. “U still awake?”
“No, I use to text in my dreams.” She answered with a grin, yawning silently. Sitting up a little she waited for his answer. Actually she didn’t like mobiles too much and she used hers only for work. But this was fun.
“Nice one! So what r u up to?”
“Sleepy in bed. Y? Wanna climb up the rain drain and join me?” she couldn’t refrain from a little chuckle. He was definitely cute and fun in her drunken state of mind.
“Don’t tempt me, Helsinki-girl! Have nice dreams, ok? See you around!” his answer came promptly and she opened a new message.
“You too, Helsinki-boy! See you in London! Sweet dreams.” Yawning again she put down her mobile. And he was definitely full of surprises.
 

Chapter 6 - Worlds Apart

Chapter Six

 
Samu closed the door, chuckling at the sight of his naked wife with her hands on her hips.
“What’s wrong with ye, Peter Pan? Want another grip at Captain Hook?”
“Awwrr!” she stomped with her foot. “You are unbearable!”
“You married me for it!” grinning he stepped closer, slapping her bottom. “Come on, join me in the shower, I got a little something for ye!” he grabbed the squealing woman and dragged her over to the bathroom. “It’s actually a big something, I hope you don’t mind!”
“Ou! Don’t give yerself too much credit, love!” she nudged him playfully before she entered the shower, closing the translucent glass door.
He was standing outside, putting his hands on the glass. “Why don’t you just admit it?” grinning he pointed at his fully erected member. “No one has ever satisfied you the way the two of us have!”
Giggling she opened the door again. “Is that so, hum?” she pulled him closer. “Prove it!” smiling she wrapped her arms around his neck.
 
When they finally got out of the shower, Elena felt her legs trembling. She slumped down on the bed trying to catch her breath.
“Don’t you wanna get dressed?” Cocking his eyebrow Samu softly kicked her foot that hung down from the bed.
Lifting her arms from her face, Elena tried to focus on him. “So you think that you and this Captain Hook of yours can do something like that to me and expect me to get up right after?” weakly she pointed at the bathroom door before she shut her eyes again and shook her head. “No way, boy!”
“Boy?” he chuckled, sitting down next to her, gently caressing her wet hair. He couldn’t resist placing soft little kisses on her cheeks and her arm that was wrapped around her forehead.
“Do me a favour and tell Hook that I don’t intend to let his boat sail in again any time soon!” she mumbled, trying to shove him away, but he slipped his hand inside her towel, opening it to kiss his way down her neck and her belly. With a little grin he felt her arching slightly into his kisses. “So no more Hook for tonight?” he whispered and shifted his weight a little, softly running his lips over her breasts.
“I didn’t say tonight, I said any time soon!” shoving her hands into his hair she pressed her lips into his gentle kiss. “Just do me a favour and get me something sugary from the minibar, I can’t move!” sighing dramatically she put her arm back over her eyes. “I’m exhausted!”
 
With his arm wrapped around her firmly, Samu entered the bar of the hotel short after seven. His friends were sitting at a table in a corner, sharing chips and chickenwings, the whole table full of snacks and pints.
“Hey!” Osmo flashed a smile at the two of them, moving a little on the bench he was sitting on, making space for them.
“Have some, we ordered too much!” Raul offered, emptying his pint to refill it and two empty glasses to hand them over to his friends. “So, did you have a good time waking up?” grinning he took a few chips, stuffing them into his mouth after dipping them into a plate with ketchup. Quickly he wiped his mouth, grabbing a few more chips. “We were just planning our new year’s party a little.” He continued with his mouth full of fries. “You don’t have plans, do you?”
“We don’t.” Samu took a sip of his beer before he took one of the chickenwings. “We are at my parent’s tomorrow and hers the day after. Actually we were thinking about a little holiday, something warm, you know?”
“Maybe we could all go somewhere.” Osmo suggested. “So what’s your plan then?”
“Dunno.” Samu leaned in, brushing his salty lips over Elena’s. “Any ideas?”
“Well, we have two options.” Resting his elbows on the wooden table, Raul continued eating. “We could take a little hut somewhere in the snow and go skiing, or,” pointing at all of them with a chickenwing, he grinned. “Or we could take something warm, like the Bahamas or something.”
“Is it warm on the Bahamas at this time of the year?” Osmo asked carefully, making Raul nudge him with his elbow.
“We will figure out, right? Wikipedia is your friend!” he leaned back, tapping Riku’s shoulder. “What about you, mate? You in?”
Riku shrugged diffidently. “Dunno, maybe.” He mumbled, staring down at his pint.
“Why are you so quiet, man?” Raul shook his arm. “What’s bitten you tonight?”
“Nothing.” Quickly he shook his head, trying to hide a blush in his glass when his gaze fell on Elena for a second. “Just tired, you know?” he leaned back. “Looking forward to getting home tomorrow. But I’m in for a holiday.” Nodding he refilled his pint. “Whatever you chose, I’m in.” He drew a deep breath, looking up at a waiter that approached the table and cleared his throat.
“Excuse me,” again the young man cleared his throat. “Some of the other guests made a request if you don’t mind.”
“Sure, about what?” Osmo shifted in his seat, resting his back at the wall.
“Well, they asked whether you would maybe sing a song for them.” The waiter raised his hands. “Only if it doesn’t bother you.” He pointed ahead. “We have a piano and a guitar over there, so... if you are in the mood just let me know, ok?” he nodded politely, leaving the table.
“Well, guitar, hum?” grinning Samu tapped Riku’s arm over the table. “What’s up, mate? Wanna sing a little?”
“No way!” Riku shook his head and frowned. “I’m tired, no one’s gonna like to listen to me now.”
“Ou come on, you pussy!” Raul pushed him softly. “Go there and sing us a song!”
“Sing us a song, you’re the pianoman!” Samu sung lowly, raising his pint.
“Just gimme a few minutes, will ye?” downing half of his glass, Riku tried to smile. From the corner of his eye he kept watching Elena like he had for the last few minutes since she had entered the bar. ‘Pathetic, Rajamaa!’ he reminded himself, trying hard to remove his stare from her smiling face. God, why did she have to be so perfectly beautiful? And above it all: Why did she have to kiss Samu? Quickly he shook his head. He had to stop this right now! She was his friend! His best friend’s wife. He had given up on her long ago and there was no way for him to ever get her back. She wasn’t available. Getting up from his chair he tossed down the last sip of his beer. “Anyone up to join me?” again he frowned when they all shook their heads in unison. He tapped the table, turning around to head for the counter.
Only a few moments later he was seated on a small chair with the guitar up on his lap, running his fingers through his messy hair. “Alright. Actually I’m extremely tired, but my friend’s over there,” he pointed at the small corner table. “They wouldn’t stop bugging me, so here I am!” straightening his sweatshirt he put his fingers on the strings, drawing a deep breath before he started to play very softly.

Elena couldn’t take his eyes off him when he leaned forward a little, his soft voice resounding from the speakers of the bar. Hell, he was so sweet and handsome! Quickly she tried to remove her gaze from his face. He was beautiful with his eyes closed and his facial features lightened by the soft lights that surrounded the piano.
Hell, he was her friend! How could she have this small tingle in her stomach whenever she looked at him? Turning over to Samu, she rested her head on his shoulder, trying to suppress a little shiver when Riku continued singing ‘I am ready’ by the Counting Crows.
God, his voice!
 
I am colour...blind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am
taffy stuck, tongue tied
Stuttered shook and uptied
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am...fine
I am covered in skin
No one gets to come in
Pull me out from inside
I am folded, and unfolded, and unfolding
I am
color...blind
Coffe black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready
I am ready
I am ready
I am fine
I am fine
I am fine
 
Sighing Riku opened his eyes and cleared his throat. He got up from the small stool, taking a quick bow. “Thanks!” again he bowed when the other customers started to applaud. “Thank you very much. Merry Christmas.” Quickly he made his way over to his friend’s table, grabbing Raul’s pint to empty it in one big gulp, completely ignoring his friends protest. “Night everyone.” He put the glass back onto the table, drawing a deep breath before nodding at all of them. “See you at breakfast!”
Sipping her beer Elena remained sitting, staring after him when he left the bar. She felt tensed, his soft and husky voice was still swirling around on her mind and she couldn’t stop thinking about him. Looking up at Samu she felt a small smile curving her lips. Actually he was everything she had ever been looking for in a man. She had dreamed about having someone like him by her side, actually she still dreamed about it, she reminded herself because she sometimes started to forget that she was actually lying in her bed at home, sleeping. Up ‘til now she had enjoyed every minute with him, every minute of this wonderful and ever returning dream.
What was it that attracted her so much to Riku? She had felt his eyes on her very often tonight and she wondered a little how he felt about her. She felt somehow bound to him and she couldn’t quite explain why she had all those feelings deep inside of her. Kissing Samu’s lips she got up after a while.

“Can you gimme the keys?” she whispered into his ear, shoving a strand of hair away when he turned around to face her astound.
“You tired, luv?”
She nodded, suppressing a little yawn. “I’m heading off to bed if you don’t mind.”
“Well, actually I do.” Smiling he pressed his lips onto hers. “Would you mind if I’d stay a little longer?”
“Of course not.” Elena smiled, rubbing the tip of her nose to his chin. “I just need a bit of rest now.” Getting up from the bench she smiled down at the three guys. “Night, my dears! Have fun, ok?” quickly she bent down to give Samu a soft kiss. “I don’t expect you to follow me any time soon, ok? Stay up for a bit, have fun.”
He returned her smile astounded. “Good to know. Thanks!” quickly he kissed her again, putting his hand on her hip to stroke it softly. “Sleep well, lovey!”
 
Upstairs in her room Elena felt everything but tired out of a sudden. Sighing she started pacing up and down the room, restlessly packing her suitcase for their upcoming vacation. She didn’t want to fall asleep, knowing that she would wake up only minutes after in her own bed. She wanted to stay. She didn’t wanna go back and wait for another day to see Samu again. Shaking her head she sat down on the bed after a while. She was definitely going crazy. This was a dream. Maybe she had to try to stop her dreams about Samu. But how? Maybe her mother knew something. Surely there were some medicaments to suppress her dreams, she had to ask her. This was all getting a little too close. Staring outside into the dark evening, Elena got up after a few minutes. She grabbed Samus coat and opened the balcony door, stepping outside into the cold darkness. When she buttoned up the coat she found a packet of cigarettes and a pocket lighter, playing around with it for a few seconds. She had quit smoking long ago and was now only having a cigarette every once in a while. Right at this second it felt like a perfect occasion, so she took one of the fags, lighting it. Enjoying the soft prickle of the nicotine in her body she rested her back at the doorframe.
“You’re back early.” A voice from the balcony next to hers made her flinch and she stepped forward.
“Why did you leave, mate?” the voice continued and Elena bent over the balustrade to look at Riku that stood behind the wooden fence that separated the balconies.
“Well, actually I was tired.” She rested her elbows on the cold metal, throwing a small smile into his surprised face.
“It’s you! Hey!” he chuckled nervously, taking a deep drag from his own cigarette.
“Hey.” Elena moved a little closer. “I thought you were tired as well.”
“Hum... yes, I was, but... I wanted to have a cigarette first.” He gestured with his right hand that held the fag. “So I went outside again.”
“Me too.” Elena sighed. “Life is strange sometimes, isn’t it?” she suddenly stated, inhaling deeply before releasing the smoke through her nose trills.
He chuckled again. “Tell me about it!” shaking his head he suddenly pointed ahead. “See that?”
Her gaze followed his outreached finger, pointing into the cloudy sky. “See what?”
“The star. Up there, see? Even though it’s cloudy, it is still there.”
Elena found the little bright spot he was aiming at before it disappeared again. “I see it. Venus, right?”
Riku drew a deep breath. “Well, for me it’s still your star.” He paused for a few seconds. “It’s always shining just as bright as your eyes.”
Completely taken by surprise Elena looked at him. Riku lowered his head, sighing silently. “D’you sometimes think about us?” he suddenly asked without looking at her, causing a little shiver to run down her spine.
“Do you?” she answered his question with another one, not sure about the things that had once happened between them.
“I do.” His answer came promptly. “I know it was long ago, but I still... well...” he let out a little sound through his gritted teeth, grabbing the rim of the balcony to lean back and stare up into the dark sky. “I like to keep my good memories close, you know?”
“So do I.” Elena smiled at him when his gaze met hers again, finding him smiling back.
“We had some good times, hadn’t we?”
“Sure!” again she tried to smile.
“Sometimes I can’t believe that I ever let you go.” He whispered out of a sudden, resting his arms on the cold metal of the handrail.
“Why did you?” she asked carefully, too curious not to ask him about it.
He chuckled. “Well, it was obvious that Samu had feelings for you and... well...” he made a quick gesture with his hand, throwing the stub of his cigarette down from the balcony. “You know all that!”
Elena couldn’t believe her ears. She had been with Riku first? And they had broken up because Samu suddenly had feelings for her? “You know that I’m a very loyal person, don’t you?” she stated in a very low voice, making him draw in a breath.
“I know that, Leni, that’s what you told me the night I broke up with you.”
“So... why did you?”
“Because I wanted you to be happy.” Helplessly he shrugged. “I knew you were... well, you were the perfect match for him, not for me, so...”
“You should have tried at least!” Elena felt anger rising in her stomach. That so wasn’t her! She was never unfaithful! “You had loyalty against attraction, I know the outcome of that equation!”
“Well, it didn’t end up too bad for you, right?” Riku gave her a chilly look. “You accepted his proposal the day after and only one day later you were married to him, right?”
“But...” completely out of words Elena stared at him, but he cut her off.
“Don’t but me, Leni! Please! It was for the best, ok?” he exhaled with a low sound. “I think that we both agreed on that.” Suddenly he turned around to face her, his eyes taking in every inch of her face. “I know you are loyal, Leni!” he whispered, reaching out his hand to touch her cheek. “But I didn’t want you to be mine for loyalty, I wanted you to stay for love. I wanted you to stay because you wanted it. Not for loyalty, babe.” Softly he ran his thumb over her chin. “Sometimes you just can’t have it all, right?” a small smile raised the left corner of his mouth and he moved in a little to kiss her cheek. “Goodnight.” He whispered before turning around and stepping back into his room. Elena remained standing on the balcony, her cheek still burning from his soft lips when she heard the door closing.
This dream obviously had a long history and she was still fighting to unravel the different layers of the past she seemed to share with all of the guys. Riku seemed special, their relationship was evidently differing from everything she had with the rest of the band. He had obviously sacrificed his own happiness to see her happy in somebody else’s arms. Elena felt a lump in her throat when she tried to grasp the whole extend of his selflessness, feeling uneasy considering her own quick change of mind. She had been with Riku but as soon as he had set her free she had gotten together with Samu. Not even a week had passed before they had gotten married. Staring down at the simple golden ring on her left ring finger, Elena swallowed hard. She felt tears burning in her throat and wished that Riku would come back outside to explain everything to her. Samu was of course attractive, he was a wonderful man and she seemed happy with him, but thinking back to the day she had spent with Riku, having lunch, strolling around London to find shoes and a dress for her, she felt a little aching inside her heart. They had been walking around arm in arm, sometimes even holding hands, not caring about the world. It was a perfect day. A special day. And she had felt so good with him. Closing her eyes, Elena leaned back at the wall. She needed a break from all of this but before she needed to clarify a few issues. Quickly she got back inside, shutting the balcony door. Still wearing Samu’s coat she made her way over to the door and out on the corridor. She drew a deep breath before knocking on the door next to hers carefully.
Riku’s eyes became round when he opened to find her on the corridor. “Everything alright?” he mumbled with his toothbrush in his mouth, before beckoning her over. “Just a sec!” quickly he rushed over to the bathroom to rinse his mouth. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring up at him when he returned.
“So...?” nervously he scratched his neck, feeling his cheeks blushing. “I... I hope I didn’t... I was too harsh, right?” Remorsefully he lowered his gaze. “Look, I... I’m sorry, Leni. I never meant to...”
He stopped astounded when Elena got up from the bed, softly putting her hand on his lips to silence him. “Shshsh.” She whispered. “You did nothing wrong, Riku.” Running her fingers over his cheek she tried to smile. “Long ago you did what you thought was best for me and I... Riku I want to apologize. I’m sorry I... God! I should have stayed. I should have fought for you.” She caressed his lips with her thumb, feeling tears welling up when she looked into his beautiful eyes. “I’m sorry Riku.” She whispered. “I want you to know that I’m really sorry.”
His lips still had a soft taste of mint when she got up on her tiptoes to kiss him goodnight. Instinctively he pulled her closer instead of stepping back, resting his lips on hers for a few intense seconds.
“I’m sorry!” she whispered against his soft mouth, the mere thought of hurting her friend, this wonderful and lovable man in front of her, ripping into the heart of her.
“Don’t be.” He whispered back with his eyes still closed, brushing his lips over hers again. “You’re happy, right?” not wanting to let go, he wrapped his arms around her tightly. “And as long as you are happy I know it was the right thing to give up on us.”
“Are you happy?” she whispered in response, softly cupping his face with her hands.
He smiled down at her. “Well,” kissing her forehead, he sighed. “Sometimes I wish that both of us had never met him, but I’m ok.” He leaned in to feel her lips one last time. “I’m ok.” He repeated, playfully nibbling her lower lip before he stepped back. “Thank you.” Forcing a little smile, he squeezed her hands. “You did nothing wrong, ok? I broke up with you.”
“But I...” Elena stepped closer again, shaking her head. “Riku, I ran off with your best mate! What could be worse?”
“You never betrayed me.” He rubbed her cheek. “You did not start something with him behind my back. That’s why we are still friends and I love you for it. Both of you.” He quickly added with blushing cheeks. “I don’t know if I would do it again though, it is a lot more painful than I expected, but I didn’t give you up for a little fling and you...” he rested his lips on her forehead. “You are happy, aren’t you?”
Looking up in those big and beautiful eyes, Elena felt her words caught in her throat. “I never meant to hurt you.” She managed to whisper after a few seconds.
He smiled down at her before pulling her into a tight embrace. “I know, baby. Your feelings for me were true, but not strong enough. I never blamed you!”
Lifting her face from his shoulder Elena looked up at him. “But I do!” she wrapped her arms around his waist. “I should have stayed!”
“You’ve been married eight years now, love. Eight years! Actually I’m glad you didn’t forget about the times we used to have so... please, stop feeling guilty! What I said outside before, I... I didn’t... I never wanted you to feel guilty! It was long ago, we’re friends, right?”
Elena nodded slowly. “We are.” She whispered back at him, softly tapping his chest. “I just wanted you to know that I am truly sorry for everything and that I never meant to hurt you in any way!”
“I know that and there’s nothing to forgive, Leni.” Smiling Riku cupped her face with his hands. “Now get some sleep, you look exhausted.”
Elena sighed and closed her eyes, snuggling her face into his warm palms. “Alright.” She whispered, hugging him again. “Sleep well, ok?” she lifted her face to kiss him goodnight before she stepped back. “Night, Riku.”
“Night, Leni.” He let go of her hand, waving her goodbye at the doorstep when she entered her own room again.
Samu was still downstairs and for the first time since she had started to dream about him, she was glad about it. She decided to go to sleep right away instead of having a shower, remembering that she had showered only a few hours ago with Samu.
Samu. Sighing she lay down on the bed. God, he was wonderful! But so was Riku and she couldn’t fight the feeling of being guilty because she had left him behind so quickly. Her head was spinning and she closed her eyes. As soon as she was awake again she would ask her mother to prescribe her some medication against her dreams. It had to stop. It was too much to bear, having two separate lives and she knew that she had to focus on her real life right now. Her work was going well, the new project sounded great and there was Rob. She needed to figure out how to deal with her real relationship instead of solving problems in a dream and feeling sorry for a person she had never met! God! This was all too much! Shutting her eyes firmly, Elena tried to force herself to sleep but it took her almost an hour to finally get her troubled thoughts under control again.